Change is hard. It’s awkward, it’s intimidating, it’s stressful. Change, no matter how it feels, cannot be changed. So, how do we deal?

Far too often we try to avoid or counteract change, but change is natural and, just like most things in life, happens for a reason. I’m not talking controlled change. No, I’m talking about the “oh crap” moment you have when something totally wild just happens out of the blue. I’m talking about a moment so powerful that you don’t feel like you’re the same person anymore kind of change. Change that happens so fast that you don’t even have a moment to question whether or not to move forward. When it comes to uncontrolled change, you never have the chance to choose whether or not it happens, or how it happens. You do, however, have the choice to be present, to cope and to find acceptance in your altered state.

How do we cope with change? Well, it’s not easy. First of all, sudden change isn’t comfortable and that’s because it challenges you to take action. You know that saying, “If it doesn’t challenge you, it doesn’t change you?” Well, hello! Controlled change (the new hairstyle you tried, or the gym you joined or the move you made) is one thing, but uncontrolled change (unexpected news or experiences that completely alter your reality) is another ball game. Coping with the unexpected requires you to be fully present in your life and to be as flexible, open, and honest with yourself as possible. Essentially, it will be easiest if you just go with it instead of reject it. Find your invisible “Don’t Panic” button and hold that sucker down.

Coping with the unexpected requires you to be fully present in your life and to be as flexible, open, and honest with yourself as possible.

I tend to be quite terrible at coping with change myself, it is still something that I’m trying to figure out. However, as I do, I’ve learned that when I’m willing to accept my reality as it stands in whatever situation, it is much easier to cope and keep moving forward. I’ve come to learn that, while abrupt upon its arrival, and often difficult to understand at first, change brings hope, it brings perspective, and it brings opportunity. We’re all going to have those unexpected wake up calls sooner or later, but that’s just life making sure we’re tuned in. How else do we expect to learn and grow?

So, yeah, change is tough, but after the initial dust settles and you accept that there’s no changing change, you realize that change can make you grow and be stronger in new ways. How incredibly boring life would be if we had to live every day the same. Therein, I suppose, lies the ironic beauty of change.